Bliss

• Friday, February 27, 2009 8:51 AM, CST
Mike and I are having a very relaxed Friday morning. Actually, Mike is still in bed. I've been checking email and getting caught up the various blogs I enjoy reading. Mike has had a good week, appearing to have a bit more energy than the prior weeks. Yesterday we spent a wonderful morning at the Kabuki Springs and Spa in Japantown. Bliss!
As you might guess, Mike and I are still basking in the afterglow of our October wedding. It was such a beautiful day for us. Next week the Supreme Court will be hearing arguments from both sides of the issue regarding the passage of Prop 8. Here is a link to view a very touching video, and with it an opportunity to have your voice heard. http://www.couragecampaign.org/page/s/divorce
Peace & Love.
Dan

Bittersweet Valentine's Day

• Saturday, February 14, 2009 8:03 PM, CST
Today has been a very thought provoking day for me. I am so grateful for the love I have in my life. I feel honored to have Mike in my life, and enjoy the occasion to let him know that I love him with all my heart. I want everyone to know that Mike is doing well right now. He started a new round of chemotherapy on Monday, and though at times it is tough on his body and spirit, I am amazed by his resilience.
One of the ways that I have found my own strength to weather through this battle is through several online support networks. In reading, or corresponding, with other spouses/caregivers, I have had the privilege of being witness to the abounding love and care that is shared among them. It amazes me that even though these people are brought together by circumstances of great pain and sorrow, each one takes the time to lend a shoulder for others. I am finding that part of this shared journey is to be hopeful when others are losing hope. To help celebrate when they are given hopeful news, and to hold them up when this part of their loved one's journey ends.
Please take time to send loving energy to the many caregivers who have had the honor of caring for their loved ones. For some this is a bittersweet day. A day when they may strongly feel their loss, while also reflecting on the gift of love they shared.
Thank you for indulging me. At times this website is my opportunity to process thoughts and feelings. They may not always be informative, or intelligible, but by writing them I draw renewed spirit.
Thanks, and love. Dan

Cloudy Days

• Thursday, February 5, 2009 9:20 AM, CST
Hi everyone. It's a cloudy day outside, but I'm feeling the sun shining down on Mike today. Yesterday we spent the whole day at Kaiser with an early morning MRI, an update appointment with Mady, Mike's nurse practitioner, and a very extended appointment at the chemo infusion center. Anyway, the MRI gave us good news, there is no significant growth on his tumor. This is great! What it means is that the new chemo, CCNU, has been successful at preventing the tumor from spreading. Mady does caution us to report any changes that come up with Mike during the next 6 week cycle, as his Avastin can cloud MRI scans, and so they can't rely solely on the images. Yet with Mike exhibiting no significant neurological changes, we are optimistic. He has been free of any seizure activity for the past four weeks. His consistent challenge continues to be fatigue and nausea.
Last weekend Barbara and Tessa visited for a couple of days. Tessa baked a delicious cake which was devoured quickly. Dante BBQ'd us some chicken for Super Bowl Sunday. We enjoyed all the good food, and skipped out on the game.
The rest of us here at home are doing our best to keep our lives in order. I recently decided to take time off from work. In trying to keep everything afloat, I have been having increased concerns managing stress. In order to take care of Mike and the kids, I also need to take care of myself. What will help me most right now is to be home with Mike. I don't want to take advatage of this good periods.
This weekend my cousin Fred is coming up for a visit. He has offered to supervise the kids so Mike and I can get away. We will be enjoying an overnight trip to the Russian River. We will count this as our romantic Valentine's Day celebration.
Thanks for all your prayers.
Love. Dan

Updated MRI

• Tuesday, February 3, 2009 2:08 PM, CST
Tomorrow Mike will go in for an updated MRI. Please keep him in your thoughts and prayers.
Love.Dan

Message from Michael

• Tuesday, January 20, 2009 10:43 AM, PST
Hello! I want to thank everyone for the wonderful messages, cards, and Bday presents. This has been the best bday ever, which was simply spent with my family; including my brother whom I haven't spent much time with over the years. Its rather ironic since this time last year I didn't think I would celebrate another bday. As mentioned in previous updates, the news has not been good lately, with the additional spreading of the tumor. The news was equally bad this time last year, so I feel very lucky to have had the last, extra, year; I've learned and experienced much during this time. We all live with the perverbial clock ticking but its strange when you're told it will stop soon. With your continued love and support, I hope to ignore the doctor's prognoses for another year; not that I'm that eager to reach fifty, but it beats the alternative.
Love and hugs, hjertelig hilsen og stor klem, - Mike

Speaking from the Heart

• Thursday, January 15, 2009 9:02 AM, CST
This month has been a month of visitors, which we really enjoy. Know that while we love having visits, it's best to gage the length of a visit by how Mike is doing. His fatigue appears to increasing, so he may at times just say a quick good-night, and see himself off to bed. Don't take it personal, he's been given permission by the all and powerful, me, to do so without explanation. Mike's fatigue is not always from something strenuous, it can often just be from system overload.
This Sunday will be Mike's birthday. We will be celebrating it with Barbara, Bob, the girls, and our boys, up in Clearlake. I encourage all of you to send Michael a birthday greeting either here or through the mail. He loves to receive cards, and I have created a scrap book so that he can go through them when desired.
Mike and I are putting our energy into being full of love and appreciation each day. I want to encourage all of us to not take each day for granted. We never know what's around the bend, so lets take full advantage to tell each other how we feel. Speaking from the heart is not as easy as it should be, so start flexing that muscle now.
Love. Dan

New Year's Wishes

• Sunday, January 4, 2009 5:52 PM, CST
I want to thank everyone who have sent Mike their well wishes. Your words of support truly touch our hearts and remind us of the safety net that our loved one's provide. We welcomed the New Year quietly with a few friends, and enjoyed recent visits with Mike's mother and short trip to visit my parents.
Mike appears to have tolerated the new Chemo without any major side effects. We will now be patient, and let the medication do it's job.
Love. Dan